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[BearFic] A Good Bear Is Hard To Find

February 12, 2009 1 comment

[I haven’t written a BearFic in quite a while.  So, I decided to randomly mix up a couple of photos I’ve collected from my online journeys as well as photos from Renaissance Faires I had attended and create some semblance of story out of them.  Even if my story gets a thumbs down, I hope that I will have made it up by posting these loverly bearish images for your viewing pleasure…]

A Good Bear Is Hard To Find
-Random BearFic-

I’m not quite sure what day it is, nor month, nor even year.  All I know is that my head hurts like a mother and I seem to be in some sort of outdoor circus.  It’s a lovely day, that’s for sure, where I could taste the hickory flavor of burnt barbecues and get drunk from various mixtures of liquor and beer.  More than likely, I’m drunk and I just do not know it.

renaissance-faire-bear-01

A stocky and grizzly man stops me in my tracks.  “Halt!” he orders, while I stare at his golden brown locks.  “Join me in our festivities, young man and aid me in drowning my sorrows over a good cup of mead!”

Sure, why not? I tell myself.  I enter his tent and I watch him wrestle with his drunken self as he tries to sit cross-legged on the ground.  I assist him as I smell his sweat from wearing such ridiculous clothing that appears to be five layers thick.

“My liege,” (for I’m not quite sure what to call him) “methinks you should rest easy and remove thy pesky robes for it is hot and the tent is oh so cool.”  I believe I giggled.

He then falls on his back, spilling his mead all over his robe.  In an instant, he begins snoring.

I am tempted to disrobe him as I am painfully curious to see what was hidden beneath that heft.

But I decide against it and remove my shirt instead to clean the beautiful grizzly bear up.

And as I leave the tent and turn around, I see him completely naked and only completely dressed by his natural thick fur.  He walks up to me and gently kisses me on my right cheek.

“Thank you,” he says as he slowly disappears within a haze of smoke.

“That’s a bit strange,” I tell myself.  “Probably some sort of trick.”

renaissance-faire-bear-02

While walking out, a younger man of spectacular girth meets me.  “Fancy sparring with me?”

Sure, why not? I tell myself.  He gives me a pole with protective foams on both ends.  I believe I giggled.

Now, being twice as light as the young bear, I am quicker on my feet.  I hit him on his belly multiple times but I do not hit as hard.  He realizes this as he yells, “Harder, lad, harder!  Hit me with all of your might!”

I listen to him until he falls on his back.  The crowd around me screams for blood while the warrior bear lies helpless on the ground.

Again, my sex throbs in pain.  How I want to just dominate the large man and tear his costume apart.

But I decide against it and remove my pants so that I, too, am humiliated from the fight.

And as I walk away, equally beaten and shamed, I see him completely naked and only completely dressed by his natural thick fur.  He walks up to me and kisses me on my left cheek.

“Thank you,” he says as he slowly disappears within a haze of smoke.

“I must learn that clever trick,” I tell myself.

renaissance-faire-bear-03

Shirtless and pantless, I see a husky man entertaining the public with a toy catapult.  It costs 1 gold to play but as I have left my pants somewhere, I do not have any funds.

The husky bear calls me and offers that I play the game for free.  “There is a catch, though.” he says.  “You must completely soak me with these water balloons first.  It’s fairly easy as I will be standing about three feet away from you.  If you don’t hit me at least once, you will owe me a hundred gold.”

Sure, why not? I tell myself.  He gives me 100 water balloons.  I believe I giggled.

He then stands approximately three feet away from me as he extends his arms and legs apart.  “You may commence.”

I do commence but I do not hit him.  Instead, I drench the Gentle Ladies of Camelot, the Mosaic Bards of the Common West, and the Lost Tribes of Myceria.

And as I kneel in front of him to offer my service of servitude for I do not have a single gold, I see him completely naked and only completely dressed by his natural thick fur.  He walks up to me and kisses me on my lips.

“Thank you,” he says as he slowly disappears within a haze of smoke.

“This is getting stranger by the minute,” I tell myself.

classic-strongman

As I walk through the grassy knolls, a large bald man blocks my way.

“Am I too good for you?” he asks me demandingly.

“I’m not sure what you mean.”

“See these biceps?  Are they not to your liking?  See the fur on my chest?  Are they not furry enough?”

And the more I look at him as he flexes his muscles, I notice that he resembles the drunken grizzly bear.

bear-at-parade

My head aches even further so I run away until I can not run any further.

In my way is a mob of large men of varying sizes.  One, in particular, catches my eye.

He then sees me as he pushes away through the throng of bearish men.

“Am I too good for you?” he asks me demandingly.

“Are you ashamed of me?  Do I frighten you among these other people?”

And the more I look at him, I notice that he resembles the bear warrior.

bear-at-carnival

I refuse to answer his questions so I run away, my head hurting even more.

I then hit a large man who’s purchasing some drinks.  I cannot help but stare and admire his beautiful build.

“Why do you resist?  Why can’t you accept who you are?”

And the more I look at him, I notice that he resembles the husky bear with the catapult.

punch-belly

With my mind reeling, I run away.  I run until the moon is within my view.  All I see is darkness except for a small dot of light in the distance.

I walk towards it and see a lone arcade machine where a parody of a large and brutish man stands waiting to be punched in the belly.

I tear up, not knowing why, and proceed to punch it on the belly.

I punch and punch and punch until my fists are red.  And I punch some more until I briefly see this image:

wrestler-fever

* * * * *

“Hey there, wake up.”

I wake up shivering and soaking from sweat.  I look around me and it appears that I seem to be in some kind of hospital tent.

“Are you feeling better?” a nurse asks me.

“Yes.  Just had the weirdest dream.”

“No stomach pains?”

“No.”

“Good.  Good.  Here, drink some water.”

I drink the water and it refreshes me.  As my vision clears up, I notice that there are many female nurses in the tent.  Many.  Way too many.

They are whispering at each other while they stare at me.  I only hear bits and pieces, such as “He’ll do” and “I should go first” and “I hope we bear boys.”

I realize what’s going on.  What a cruel joke this is.  I call my nurse and request for a larger female first.

Also, a blindfold.